Date: 30-09-98
Title: Despair is a lovely tune
Author: Jess
Email: vessar27@hotmail.com
Rating: NC17 to be safe
Disclaimer: Fox Mulder and Dana Scully belongs to Chris Carter and Fox
Network. No copyright infringement intended and no money is being made
from this.

Summary: Scully has been kidnapped and is used as a bait to lure Mulder
into a trap. From the kidnapperÕs point of view.

AuthorÕs notes: This is a dark story written from the point of view of a
sick and twisted mind (that would be the kidnapperÕs mind - not mine).
If thatÕs not for you, please donÕt read it.

Feedback: Yes please! I want it, I need it. Send a line to:
vessar27@hotmail.com

Despair is a lovely tune
by Jess

I watch her as I walk down the steps to the cargo room. I smile.
She stares at me. Hate and fear coming and going across her face, as if
sheÕs having trouble deciding which feeling is stronger.

She has been here on the ship for three days. Sitting on a chair by the
far wall. Tied up. Unable to move, unable to speak. I know she hates me
and thatÕs fine. She will hate me even more.

I walk up to her and she stares defiantly at me.

"I have a surprise for you, Scully. Your partner is here."

The look in her face changes. Hope flashing by. Then fear. Greater fear
than she has ever displayed since I brought her here. She knows how I
feel about Mulder. IÕve told her plenty of times. But now is the first
time she realizes that she has been a bait to lure him here. Now she
realizes what will happen. Bright girl. But not like him. And not the
one I want.

And there comes that hate again. Muffled threats through the gag. I know
she would kill me right now if she only had the chance. It makes me feel
good. Important. Worth killing. I smile.

"He turned himself over to me, just to save you. Can you believe that?
But he doesnÕt know why heÕs here. LetÕs keep it a surprise a little bit
longer."

I wink at her. Teasingly. Her eyes turns cold. So unlike his expressive
eyes. I turn my back to her. Suddenly disgusted by her. What cruel God
could let her be around him? Soiling him. Preventing him from be what he
could be. The cold-hearted bitch! IÕll make her pay. IÕll make them both
pay.

I walk up the stairs again to get him. HeÕs still sitting where I left
him. Of course he is. He couldnÕt go anywhere even if he wanted to. His
eyes are blindfolded and his hands are cuffed behind his back.

He hears my footsteps and tenses. I stand in front of him. Watching. His
tongue nervously flickers out to lick his luscious lips.

Before I can stop myself I slap him hard across the face. He gasps by
the sudden pain. His head thrown to one side. If he wasnÕt so
beautifully helpless, I would take his blindfold off right now so I
could see the pain and confusion in his eyes. Feed off it. But I leave
it on. For just a little while longer.

I breathe heavily. Trying to keep my calm. Breathe in through my nose,
out through my mouthÉ My raging hard-on doesnÕt make it any easier.

He turns back his face. Drips of blood falling from his cut bottom lip.
I bite my tongue to stop the moan threatening to make its way out. My
hand reaches out. But I donÕt touch him. No. I caress the air around his
face. Close enough for it to feel real to me, but not close enough for
him to notice.

"IÕve done everything you said. Please take me to Scully."

I flinch when I hear his voice. Still worrying about that bitch. Poor
bastard. He doesnÕt have a clue that itÕs all about him. But heÕll find
out soon enough.

I grab him by the arm, ignoring his reflexive attempt to pull away. I
drag him up on his feet and lead him to the stairs. He doesnÕt fight me,
walking like a good dog beside me. Maybe IÕll reward him for that. Or
then again, maybe not.

I push him in front of me.

"Stairs. IÕll help you."

He nods his head and lets me put my arms around his waist. Trusting me,
Mulder? What ever happened to trust no one?

We slowly walk down the stairs. The heat from his body is radiating
through the thin fabric of his shirt, burning my skin. IÕll make him pay
for making me feel like this. IÕll make him pay for it all.

WeÕre almost at the end of the stairs. I know Scully can see him now.
>From the waist anyway. SheÕll know itÕs him on the ridiculously
expensive designer pants heÕs wearing.

I move my hands from his stomach to his sides. See this, Scully. I smile
and give him a light push. It is all it takes. His feet tries to find
safe ground again, but to no use. He gasps. DoesnÕt scream. ThatÕs my
boy. I hear her cry out though. High pitched voice, terrified. Terrified
for the life of her partner, for the exquisite neck of his. Well, he
wonÕt break it. Not from this height.

He hits the floor with a loud thump. Landing on his shoulder and arm.
Moaning in pain.

"Oh, thatÕs going to leave a mark."

IÕm addressing Scully, but she ignores me. She shouts his name, but it
sounds so ridiculous through the gag that it almost makes me laugh.

I walk the down the stairs to stand by Mulder.

"What did you break, Mulder? A few ribs? Nothing new to you. The arm?
Dislocated shoulder? Well, deal with it. ItÕs just the beginning. You
belong to me now."

I sink down on my knees and gently remove the blindfold from his eyes.
HeÕs blinking, trying hard to keep his pain under control. Looking at
me. Then Scully. Smiling weakly. Trying to show her that heÕs all right.
That angers me. Infuriates me. I realize that he will never be mine.
Never really and completely mine.

The world turns red. Red like the blood I will spill on this dirty cargo
floor. I grab his shirt and drag him over to where Scully is sitting. He
squirms in my grip, but he canÕt get away. I throw him down on the
floor.

"Watch this, bitch! This is your fault!"

Her eyes are wild with fear. I start hitting him. In his face. His
pretty face. Blood coloring my hands, running from his nose and mouth.
Making beautiful patterns on the gray floor. HeÕs quiet. Accepting what
will come. All beauty must die, all beauty must die, all beauty must
dieÉ

Scully is screaming. Begging. Probably crying too. Despair is a lovely
tune. And so suitable. I move my attention to his body. Beating him
senselessly with my fists. Leaving red marks of my knuckles on his white
shirt. He moans weakly when I hit his already broken ribs and ScullyÕs
screams complete the scene with her interpretation of background music.

I am out of breath when I stop. He is still conscious. Good.
I look at him. He is so beautiful in pain. So alive. More alive than
ever with Death just a few feet away, waiting to ask him for the last
dance.

I pull out my knife. He looks at it and then at me. Fear flashing by,
then calmness settles. Acceptance. Longing for a release from the pain.

His head turns to Scully. I can see his mouth shape the words - I love
you. SheÕs crying silently now. But I can still hear her tears as they
are running down her cheeks.

Enough. I raise my hand over my head and bring the knife down. He gasps
when the blade sinks into his stomach. Blood is quickly seeping through
his shirt, running down his side to rest in a pool on the floor.

I love him. I deserve him. And I hope he can feel it. I lean down to
kiss him. His lips is soft and wet. His blood fills my mouth with its
rich, coppery taste. I have tasted him now, really tasted him and my
hunger for him is stronger than ever. HeÕs everything I hoped he would
be. IÕm just sorry that he made me so mad I had to kill him.

I stiffen. Sounds. Unnatural sounds. Sounds that donÕt belong on an
empty cargo ship. Intruders. I stand up. I guess this isnÕt the night
for him to die. Well, thatÕs okay. IÕm kind of glad. This way I get to
play with him again. Cause I wonÕt give him up. Not ever.

"IÕm sorry this didnÕt turn out the way I hoped. But I will see you
again, Mulder. ThatÕs a promise."

I lay a hand on Scully and whisper:

"You canÕt save him."

Then I leave. Unnoticed. The cold stare she gave me is still fresh in my
mind. IÕm taking that as a promise for a continuation. I will hear
Despair played again. But thatÕs for later. Now is when I get away. They
wonÕt find me even though theyÕll try. No one knows my name. No one
knows who I am. IÕm nobody. Nothing.

The end

Feedback to: vessar27@hotmail.com

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