From: "Anne-Marie Forker" Subject: 'BELIEVE THE LIE' Date sent: Mon, 13 Oct 1997 11:31:38 PDT DISCLAIMER: Unfortunately Mulder and Scully don't belong to me but to the genius Chris Carter. Skinner is his too! NC-17 warning! Serious Scully angst here. Scully tries to accept that Mulder is dead. Spoiler....Gethsemane. FEEDBACK IS WANTED!! I'll reply to all, however bad:-) DEDICATION: I'm dedicating this to someone who posted my first story 'Call Me Fox' and gave it a great review. Izy Bristow ...this is for you!:-) 'BELIEVE THE LIE' by Anne-Marie Forker ('Foxy Mulderette') "What the hell did that guy say to you, that you believe his story?" "He said that the men behind this hoax, behind these lies.....gave me this disease to make you believe." The look on Mulder's face after she had answered his question haunted her soul as she entered his apartment. She barely noticed the police officers, all her mind was focused on was the body on the floor beneath the thin layer of white sheet. The fear that Eugene Tooms, Duane Barry and even Donnie Pfaster had inflicted upon her was miniscule compared to the terror she felt when one of the police detectives began to lift the protective sheet, and Scully saw what lay underneath. Mulder. 'It's Mulder.......oh God no......it's him......Mulder no...' A thousand emotions ran through her while her mind registered one thing.....It's Mulder. Mulder is dead. She could feel the sharp knife of terror tearing down to her stomach from her throat. The man she had shared so much with was lying lifeless on the floor. The man she loved so entirely she felt a part of herself dead in front of his couch. "Is it Him?" the detective asked. Scully somehow heard his words through the thick clouds of doom that surrounded her. "Yeah." she responded as she tried to breathe. Yes, it was Mulder. Scully needed to leave, to get out, to be by herself. Though no matter how many people surrounded her, she was truly by herself now. Scully was alone. She managed to get to her car and drive back to her apartment. Scully was in shock, any details of the journey oblivious to her. The sorrow she felt overwhelmed everything else, as did her guilt. 'What have I done? Why did I tell him?' She could still picture his face in her mind. Scully tried to imagine what he had felt like when she had told him they had given her cancer to 'make him believe.' She knew it was close to how she felt when she saw his dead body. He had left her after that, he needed to get out, just as she had. 'Mulder is dead.' 'DEAD.' Scully never made it to her living room as she collapsed helplessly on the floor in the hall. The weight of her grief was too heavy emotionally and physically ot remain standing. She began to cry quietly, still struggling to gain some sort of composure, but to no avail. One of Mulder's coats had fallen on the floor in front of her as she had fallen beside the hall stand. He had kept that at her place for convenience. Scully reached for it and gathered it in her arms, just as he had held her several times. She buried her face in the coat and began to sob. 'Mulder I love you.....Why God? What am I going to do? Mulder I need you so much....I should have showed you.....now you're gone....' Thoughts raced through her head so fast it was almost as if they were physically pushing the tears from her eyes. Then her tears fell freely, needing no push, as she began to wail. She pressed her face further into his coat. She couldn't bear it, the grief was even worse than when Melissa had died. Mulder was her best friend, her partner, her soulmate. He was her oar in the journey along the sea of truth, and now without him she thought she would drown, in her tears. Scully felt something press on her shoulder. She was too emotional to feel any kind of surprise, until she looked up. Mulder. "Mulder?" She saw him kneel in front of her, resting a hand on her shoulder. He looked concerned, and he looked beautiful to her. 'I'm dreaming....it can't be.' she thought. Then he stroked her cheek, cupping the side of her face in his hand. His touch felt so real to her. She wanted it to be real. "Mulder....I...." "Dana, don't cry....please." Mulder didn't want to cause her any more pain than he thought he already had. Scully gave him a puzzled look, she was feeling, as Mulder would describe it, 'a little confused.' "There's a plan. It's their turn to believe the lie, the lie that I'm dead. I waited here for you. I need your help." Scully was overwhelmed with relief and joy. Fox Mulder was alive. It wasn't enough just to see him, she needed to feel him, to convince her mind body and soul that he was real. To give him what she had wanted to for so long. Any barriers that work had created were broken, he was allegedly 'dead'. Any barriers she had created herself were demolished, she had lost and found him again, a second chance. She didn't want to hear of his plan just yet. Mulder wiped the last of her tears away but kept his hands on her cheeks. She looked at him, staring, unable to remove her focus from his eyes. Their gazes locked. Each of them remained still until Scully brought her hand up to stroke Mulder's face. He was definetly real, but she wanted more. She gently traced his full bottom lip with her thumb. Mulder closed his eyes, then opened them again and watched Scully sigh heavily. He felt intense desire for her. Mulder leaned further toward Scully and finally, after four years, lightly brought his lips to hers. Their kiss was beautifully tender. Mulder was shaking, and she could feel it. She needed more. Four years of repressed love and desire in addition to the relief of finding him alive was too much to be resolved in one tender kiss, no matter how great it felt. Scully sighed his name and pulled him to her, deepening their kiss passionately and wrapping her arms around his waist. Mulder responded to her touch, to her need, and to his own. Their tongues entwined as he lay her down on the soft carpet. He pulled from their kiss, both of them breathing heavily. He gave her one last questioning look. Did she truly want this? His question was answered as Scully smiled gently and pulled the bottom of his shirt from his trousers, gently running her hands over his back and waist, then to his stomach. She pulled at his belt. Mulder needed no further reassurance. The woman he loved wanted him, and he would give himself to her entirely. She wouldn't hurt him. He trusted her, she was Dana Scully. Mulder kissed her passionately again and opened the buttons of her blouse, leaving it hanging around her arms as he brought a hand to her breast, while pulling her bra down with the other. Scully gasped with pleasure, feeling the touch she had dreamed of for years. She arched her bak slightly, pushing her breast further into the palm of his warm, strong hand. She didn't want this to go slowly, the flame of her desire burning inside threateneing to consume her. Scully pulled his belt off and flung it carelessly away. She unzipped and pushed down the top of his trousers, then used her feet to push them off his long athletic legs completely. Mulder managed to remove her tights, and ran his hands over her strong calves and over her thighs, pushing her skirt up to her waist. He knew she wanted him, needed him, it didn't matter that hey remained half dressed. Scully tugged at his shirt, the desire now so fierce in her that she ripped it open, exposing his strong chest. She brought her mouth to his nipple and carressed his buttocks with her hands. Mulder felt the electric shivers run through his body, centering in his groin. He struggled to remove her underwear as she lifted her hips towards him. Scully ran her fingers up the inside of his thighs and cupped his testicles with one hand, while stroking his erect shaft with the other. Mulder groaned and curled his toes, partly in pleasure but also in an attempt to endure. Scully saw that like her, he was on the edge of ecstacy. She could feel his heavy breathing in her ear, the she heard those precious words from her dreams, "I love you." Scully inhaled deeply while she ran her fingers over his abdomen, his chest, over his neck and entwined them in his hair. She exhaled as she whispered breathlessly in his ear, "I love you Fox Mulder." Mulder lifted his face to look into her soul. Again their gazes locked. He gulped when he saw her expression of love for him. They kissed deeply and passionately, both of them experiencing a love and need they had never knew before, finally facing the truth. The acknowledgement of this heightened their desire even more, now sweating and gasping for breath. "Now Mulder, now...." Scully pleaded, whispering into his mouth and squeezing his buttocks. Mulder thrust into her, gasping deeply as she threw her head back and arched her body, groaning his name. Connected at last, completely. Two bodies together, two souls as one. After a few seconds Scully began moving her hips and Mulder responded, letting her set the pace even though he felt like exploding inside her any second. Scully thrust faster and faster, letting go of any control, showing her trust in Mulder. She moaned as Mulder pushed further into her, matching her speed. Scully felt his hands over her breasts, then his mouth as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She felt the muscles in her entire body begin to spasm, and thrusted at a furious speed, as did Mulder. She moaned loudly, over and over again until she screamed as her orgasm came powerfully. Mulder looked at her beautiful face as she wore the expression of pure ecstacy, that he had given her, and he yelled her name as he exploded inside her. They collapsed on the hall floor together, still clinging to each other and inhaling their sweaty, musky scent. They held one another in silence for a long while, neither wanting release. Scully was fully convinced now that he was truly alive. Any scientist could not denounce the evidence! She wondered what lay ahead for him, for them. Mulder still had to inform her of this 'plan', and he knew there wasn't much time. "Dana, I need to explain a few things." He was the master of understatements. "You can start with the body I identified Mulder." "Clone." "From where?" "Skinner....well actually, from Cancerman." Scully gave him a shocked and puzzled look, raising an eyebrow. "After I left you I went to my apartment. Skinner turned up with the dead clone. He told me Cancerman was willing to deal." "Deal...with him!?" Scully was concerned. "I became a greater threat to him by coming so close to the truth. Even if the creature found in the Yukon Territory isn't extraterrestrial, there was something I, we, were not supposed to find out." "What does he want exactly?" "To end the X Files, with my 'death' and....." Mulder hesitated. "And what Mulder?" she demanded. "It's time for you to debunk the X Files Scully, time to divorce 'Spooky' Mulder." "No." "Yes Scully, if you publically discredit my, our work in your report, then he'll go through with the deal." "What makes you think he'll follow through Mulder? What the hell are you doing dealing with that black lunged son of a bitch anyway?" "I'm not the only one who has dealt with him. Skinner has done something, though he won't tell me. Cancerman has to follow through." "You still haven't told me what you're dealing for...does he know where you're sister is?" Silence. "Mulder..." "I'll get a cure for your cancer." Scully was speechless. "I mean it Dana, I can get it." "Mulder I..." "What?" "I can't let you sacrifice the X Files and your official 'life' for a cure for me, if it even exists." Mulder was touched deeply by her words, but she had no choice here. "The deal is already half made. The only other option is for Cancerman to really kill me, then I'd never know if you would make it. Skinner probably dealt for our lives." Scully wondered what kind of hell Skinner had gotten himself into. "How can I discredit you Mulder?" "You can, make them believe the lie. We both know it's not the truth." "What about your life?" "I recall you saying I didn't have a 'life'" he teased. "You do now." Mulder smiled. "Well?" "I've come back from the dead before!" "Cut the crap Mulder." "Skinner told me he knows more than Cancerman thinks he does, something about the 'creature' and the samples taken from it. Remember, nothing disappears without a trace. After you're cured, I'll be back somehow." "So he'll deal for your reinstatement, again?" Mulder nodded. "Somehow." "You're risking a hell of a lot." "It's the only way." Silence again. "I don't want to be left in the dark again Mulder." She sounded like her mother. Scully knew what she had to do, she had to lie, for her life, for his life. They held each other while she thought of what would happen. Both of them never wanted to deal with Cancerman, a dangerous path lay ahead. Mulder believed the plan would work, and once again she found herself gaining strength from his beliefs. "Thankyou Mulder." she whispered. "No, thankYOU Dana." she had given him a reason to live. Dana Scully tried to appear confident as she walked into the FBI headquarters where she had to give her report. It upset her immensely to have to discredit Mulder to Section chief Blevins and the entire FBI. She was also worried about the danger both of them would inevitably be confronted with. Scully hoped any sadness she displayed would be interpreted by the agents in the room as grief at her partner's 'death.' As she came to the end of her report she struggled to finally make them believe the lie, to put the last nail in the invisible coffin. "Agent Scully?" She fought back tears as she struck the final blow of the hammer, "Agent Mulder died, late last night, from an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound to the head." THE END Feedback, pretty please:-) Hope you found something to enjoy! 'Foxy Mulderette'